I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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