So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize