Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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