Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize