What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
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I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
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Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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