Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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