Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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