I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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