I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I intend to get homeless drunk
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I am naked and annoyed.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize