I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
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This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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