I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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