His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
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Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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