someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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