Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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