Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
do nipples grow back?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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