They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize