I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I wish you could order shots online.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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