I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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