ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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