hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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