her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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