So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize