Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize