When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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