omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Randomize