is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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