I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
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It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
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Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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