i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
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And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
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he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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