It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
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