Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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