he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize