CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
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