you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i scared a bird with my dick
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
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