At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize