There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize