how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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