We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize