when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
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