Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Swine flu is the new snow day.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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