yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
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I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
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Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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