i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
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