I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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