Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize