Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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