dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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