How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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