Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'm just crazy horny about you
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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