I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
i believe in u and ur pee
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