we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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