I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
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